Shrink 'dat Thang

Monday afternoon I went to Dr. Chang's (the Kung Pao Cancer is to die for) and had the Chemo pump refilled. It actually was empty at about 3am on Monday. I know this because when it's empty, it beeps every 5 minutes. Good for me that I start working at 4:30am anyway! The blood tests at Dr. Chang's say that my blood is very healthy right now, the best it has been since all this started in December. That's great news because one side effect of the 5FU (the Chemo) is that it suppresses the bone marrow and reduces the production of red blood cells. They expect my numbers will slowly decrease over the next 4-5 weeks, but it's great that we are starting from a high level.

Tuesday, I met with Dr. Hansen at the Radiation Oncology unit at St. V's and he said my radiation regimen is doing great and all the X-rays they take each day to get me lined up on the table are looking really good. I also met Amy the Social Worker there (no, I'm not being adopted). She helped me find a new primary care physician because I had fired my previous PCP due to poor customer service attitude. I go to Dr. Fullman in Tualatin next Tuesday.

I'm feeling well today but for the tube coming out my chest and the occasional realization that I must quickly make it to another room in the house for a bit. Jeanah is in good spirits and we're trying to deal with who is going to provide our Cable, Internet, Phone, and Cell services...lotsa fun!

He works the Night Shift

Early this morning I had a dream that was important to me. I don't remember dreams often, but this was vivid. Thought I'd share because it was one of those conscious/subconscious/body/soul/spirit kinds of deals.

Through some events in the dream, all the emotion and pain of the events in recent months (cancer, deciding not to be foster parents, etc.) welled up inside me. I was in the middle of a forest clearing on a dark, starry night and I was yelling “WHY” at the top of my lungs. “Why are You letting these things happen to me?”

The phrase “I hate you God” was proposed to me from somewhere, but I yelled “I hate having to go through this!” instead. I kept yelling “Why” “Why are You letting these things happen to me?” “I hate having to go through this!” over and over.

In my mind, I was kind of awake and aware in bed, but obviously not awake. After a time I was crumpled on the ground. I got a sense that it was OK and even expected that I would have been doing this and that God understands. His Spirit comforts me and in my dream feel like I'm back in bed with Jeanah next to me, her head on my shoulder, warm and snuggly.

Then I woke up...2:10am A few minutes later, my Chemo pump beeped telling me it's low on Chemo. This is OK as I'm heading into the doctor at 1pm today to get it refilled.

Later I had another dream. I don't usually share this type of thing, but I got the very real sense I was to pray for the people of Ames, Iowa that they would be able to endure a natural disaster that was coming.

Thanks for listening! God understands us, knows our needs, and He comforts us in time of need.

Situation Normal

Nothing real new to report today. We had a lovely time last night with two of Jeanah's sisters (Julie and Livvy) and their husbands (Jim and Matt) and Julie and Jim's 6 kids (Lauren, Emma, Sam, Mae, Nora, and Millie). It's great to spend time with those you love!

Anyways, feeling pretty normal this weekend...maybe a bit tired...but it's hard to say if that's the Chemo or if it's just winter talkin'. (Still best to be close to the restroom).

Matt showed us a wonderful waste of time called Fantastic Contraption and I've spent about 4 hours on it today. Matt is in such trouble.

Finally, I gotta mention that this weekend, my OSU Beavers beat both the Bay Area Pac-10 schools in hoops for the first time in 16 years. They're playing great ball right now. Go Beavs!

Worth 1000 Words

I thought it was time I posted the pics Jeanah coaxed out of the Gastroenterologist. Yep, what you see is real, unadulterated Rectal Cancer...and something I like about as much. WARNING: it's a medical picture, so I just put the link here: RECTAL CANCER

Today, my Radiation process changed some. They went from the "normal" type of radiation to what they call "IMRT". Read more about it here: IMRT LINK

Anybody Seen my Wallet?

Today I physically feel like some guy named Big Louie met me in a dark alley, kicked the tar out of me, and stole my wallet. However, I also felt this way on Jan 1. after getting the original port-a-cath installed, and yesterday was of course a double dose of that because they had to remove the old one too.

The good news is the Chemo pump seems to be working great. Jeanah drove me to St. Vincent's and I got a shot of radiation to my keister and we found a great "sneak" entrance where I can go right into Radiation Oncology without walking through the entire hospital!

I've been able to work from home today as expected. Only one DSL drop all day, although I gotta say VoIP is not all it's cracked up to be. The regular phone works tons better...

Speaking of working from home, I realized how much I miss the "old" ISI office when we could watch the sunrise from Support every morning. Did you catch it today? Here it is from my office window at home this morning.

Isn't God's handiwork AWESOME!?

2nd Time's the Charm

The installation of the new Port-a-Cath seems to have gone without a hitch. Woo Hoo!

It took a little longer than expected, but I was able to take a later tee-time with the Radiation folks and so now we have 2 radiations down and about 26 to go! It's supposed to go 5 1/2 weeks, so that's Feb 25/26.

This afternoon I got the Chemo pump installed. It's about 8" x 5" and fits in a little pouch that I can hang around my neck or shoulder. It's not too awfully bad.

The doc really doesn't think I'll experience too many side effects because the low dosage, although consistent, is very small.

We'll see!

We also had Canby Telephone come out and do extensive testing on our DSL. They think they may have narrowed down the problem to the type of DSL modem they had us using. They gave us a different type and we'll see how that goes. I'll be trying to work all day tomorrow (except for my 10:12 Radiation tee-time) and see how many times it drops.

God is good!

More Fun Tomorrow!

We found out today that the Port-a-cath for whatever reason, is malfunctioning. Tomorrow at 6am I go in to St. Vincent's to have another one put in. They're trying the right side this time. Surgery at 8am. Should just be heavy sedation, no anesthesia needed just like last time.

I have a 10:12 tee-time in the radiation oncology office at St. V's to get my 2nd dose of radiation. The first one went well today. I didn't notice anything during the visit, but let's just say I'm sticking near the restroom.

Because of the port-a-cath problems, we didn't start Chemo today. That's scheduled tomorrow at 1:40.

I actually got about 3 hours of work-from-home in today! Gotta pay those hospital bills!

Woo Hoo!

Something to Cheer About

Mom, Dad, and I took Jeanah to her first college basketball game on Saturday night. Well, there wasn't much to cheer about as the Beavers lost 85-59.

However, today I realized I had a voicemail on my cell which has been on vibrate since Friday's doctor visit.

It was Dr. Hansen (Radiation Oncologist) letting me know that the results of the MRI on Wednesday looked great and there isn't any evidence of cancer spread into the bones.

Praise the Lord! Great news!!

Looking forward to tomorrow...

The Weekend Begins

Around lunchtime today I had a tingle in my left, front neck and it got a little more annoying as the day went on. I went to Home Depot after work and decided to head to the Doctor's office after. It felt like something might be happening with the Port-A-Cath in my chest or the other end of it in my vein. ????

They had trouble before with the Port-A-Cath not giving a backflow of blood. However, today they were able to draw blood just fine and flushed it. However, since I feel like there is a little squirt gun in the back of my throat when they flush it, they want to do a "dye study" on Monday just to make certain that thing is in the right place.

So...Monday:

8:00am...St. Vincent's...Dye Study

11:00am...St. Vincent's...Cancer Dietician

11:30am...St. Vincent's...First Radiation Therapy

1:40am...Dr. Chang's...Chemo Begins

Let the fun begin!!

Have a great weekend!!

The Jackhammer

If you've ever had an MRI, I'll bet you know what I mean. I couldn't believe how noisy the MRI machine is!

I had an MRI today because Dr. Hansen wants to make certain that some "stuff" he saw in the PET/CT is in fact the start of arthritis in my lower lumbar region, and not anything to do with cancer...so, that's right, we are now praying that I "do" have arthritis.

This would go with Jeanah's Ankylosing Spondylitis (say that 5 times fast), but I don't think it's nearly as bad because I don't feel it...

Yesterday we met with Dr. Crocenzi (crow-chen-zee), another Medical Oncologist at Providence Cancer Center downtown to get a 2nd opinion and just to have another "team member" to bounce things off. He says the plan we're going on is good. We felt very comfortable with him too. Good to have good doctors.

Ta ta for now

A Family Affair

I meant to post this yesterday, but didn't get to it.

We prayed on Christmas with Jeanah's side of the family and Yesterday with my side of the family. Both were great get-togethers, and we need to do it more often under happier circumstances!

Some of the prayer requests we brought to the table yesterday were:

1) The Chemo/Radiation regimen will shrink the tumor significantly or completely.

2) Victor will tolerate the Chemo/Radiation with few or no side effects.

3) Victor, Jeanah, and the Doctors will have clarity and wisdom in making difficult decisions.

4) We will get confirmation after Chemo/Radiation that the tumor has not spread, but is local and removeable.

5) Jeanah will have strength and energy to do the things she needs to do to simplify our home life.

6) The Canby house will sell quickly and for a satisfactory price and we will be able to find a place to land safely.

7) Victor will be able to work well from home (or even at the office) with minimal physical or technical glitches.

Love ya'll!

Hurry up and Wait! (A one week reprieve)

Patience is a virtue, and I'm learning lots of it!

Today we changed plans slightly. I was supposed to start Chemo today, but prior to that (and it's a good thing) I went in to get "mapped" for Radiation and the Radiation Oncologist decided that because of several factors including my size and the location of the tumor, he wants to change the method of administering the radiation.

He's going to setup a deliverance method (I forget the initials of it) where the radiation is applied from 4-5 different angles and shapes so that it doesn't all focus on the same external place and so that the internal end of the beam is better focused on the tumor. This will give a better chance of having less of the "sunburn" as a side effect. Sounds good to me.

However, this takes 4-5 days to setup the Radiation Machine to do and so Radiation won't start until Monday, 1/19. For this reason, it was decided also to start the Chemo that day because they want them to coincide as much as possible.

Tomorrow, 2pm: I meet with Dr. Crocenzi, another Medical Oncologist, mainly to get a 2nd opinion and to get other ideas if Dr. Chang did not explore them. I suppose I may also choose to move my care to Dr. Crocenzi if I feel more comfortable there. We shall see...

Wednesday, 2:30pm: I am having an MRI at Epic Imaging. In the PET/CT earlier there is some haziness around my lumbar area and they think it is due to minor arthritis types of flare up, but they just want to make absolutely certain.

Sunburn where the sun don't shine

Today we talked to the Radiation Oncologist, Dr. Eric K. Hansen of Oregon Cancer Specialists at St. Vincent.

I'll be seeing a lot of Dr. Hansen over the next 6 weeks and he'll, well, be seeing more of me than anybody should.

He had the most positive thing to say that any Doctor has said since we found out about the cancer. He said that we have actually caught this thing pretty early in its development and that he thinks there's about a 90% chance of shrinking it, removing it, and not having it bother us again. Them's pretty good odds...maybe we should go to Vegas, Baby!?

Although I'll start Chemo on Monday, and get "mapped" for Radiation on Monday, the actual Radiation regimen won't start until Thursday. He says about 2 weeks into the process, I'll start being very tender in some very tender spots and it will be like having a bad sunburn where the sun don't usually shine...or maybe slightly worse.

While that doesn't sound too fun, I say we fry that little bugger and get on with the next phase...

Have a great weekend!

Victor

Homework

Several of you have asked if I plan to work during my Chemo/Radiation treatment. The answer is Yes, I do plan to work. ISI has been very gracious and is working to help me setup a work station at home just in case I am unable to come into the office for one reason or another.

In the estimation of my oncologist, I should be able to do my job. I'm thankful at this point I don't have a very physically demanding job.

Jeanah also continues to look for work as we are uncertain at this point what the future holds and we are in "keep the options open" mode. She is the best receptionist in the world if you know of a company she would be needed. She has myriad other skills as well including a love of home design.

Trusting God day by day.

I'd say my energy level today is about 8/10 which is as good as it has been in a month. I'll continue to evaluate that as we go forward...

Know Thine Enemy

We know a bunch more now, but we don't know as much as we wish.

We got positive confirmation from the pathologist that we are dealing with adenocarcinoma which is the most common type of rectal cancer and is what the oncologist expected from the visual exams in the first place.

In a way, it's nice to know what we're dealing with, but it's a bummer (pun intended) to know that it is indeed cancer and the "worser" kind, not the "better" kind.

The plan doesn't change. I am to start Chemo on Monday 1/12 and it will continue approximately 6 weeks. This will be coupled with radiation therapy. After the six weeks we will have another PET/CT to determine what the Chemo and Radiation have done to the tumor.

Also, in the most recent PET/CT there is a possibility of "hot spots" of other cancer around the tumor outside the rectal walls, but the oncologist said these are very small and it is his opinion that these may not be cancerous and may be from the C Diff infection inflammation. In any case, it does not effect the treatment plan at this time.

We will treat for 6 weeks with Chemo and Radiation like has been planned and reevaluate at that time to see what the next step is.

Please pray that:

1) ...the Chemo and Radiation will shrink the tumor.
2) ...the tumor is "local" and that the several "hot spots" are not actually cancerous.
3) ...I will tolerate the radiation and chemo well and still be able to work and function with some semblance of normalcy.

God Bless!

Victor

Hoping for a Plan

Yesterday's Iron Infusion is done, but it took much longer than expected due to my Port-A-Cath not working necessarily as expected. Please pray that the Port-A-Cath will work better in the future so they don't need to surgically reposition it! (It seemed to accept an IV just fine, but they couldn't draw blood through it very well).

Today, at 2:20 we have an appointment with Dr. Chang to discuss "the plan" and hopefully will go over the pathology, the PET/CT from last week, and hopefully will know more about what's going to happen from here.

Next Week's Game Plan

I got a call from my "2nd opinion" oncologist after he got the results of the pathology. He said the report was inconclusive. This is not necessarily "good news" but it does mean that it is not confirmed cancer and not confirmed the worst type of cancer for that location. We'll just have to wait to see.

I go to my primary oncologist, Dr. Chang, on Monday for a blood iron infusion because I was anemic in the hospital.

Tuesday, I go back for an appointment with Dr. Chang to go over the pathology and to lay out a game plan for Chemotherapy.

Friday, I go to Dr. Hansen, the Radiation Oncologist to see what radiation and other studies I am a good candidate for.

We are still anxious about that pathology report. Keep prayin' that it will come back with good news!

Last Friday 1/2/09, I had a PET/CT scan. Basically, they inject you with a irradiated sugar compound which cancer cells love to absorb and then an hour later they torture you by making you hold your hands above your head for a long time. The longer your torso, the longer you have to remain in that position. Lucky for me my torso "goes forever" in Jeanah's words.

We should know more about the PET scan on Tuesday as well.

God Bless!

Victor