Shrink 'dat Thang

Monday afternoon I went to Dr. Chang's (the Kung Pao Cancer is to die for) and had the Chemo pump refilled. It actually was empty at about 3am on Monday. I know this because when it's empty, it beeps every 5 minutes. Good for me that I start working at 4:30am anyway! The blood tests at Dr. Chang's say that my blood is very healthy right now, the best it has been since all this started in December. That's great news because one side effect of the 5FU (the Chemo) is that it suppresses the bone marrow and reduces the production of red blood cells. They expect my numbers will slowly decrease over the next 4-5 weeks, but it's great that we are starting from a high level.

Tuesday, I met with Dr. Hansen at the Radiation Oncology unit at St. V's and he said my radiation regimen is doing great and all the X-rays they take each day to get me lined up on the table are looking really good. I also met Amy the Social Worker there (no, I'm not being adopted). She helped me find a new primary care physician because I had fired my previous PCP due to poor customer service attitude. I go to Dr. Fullman in Tualatin next Tuesday.

I'm feeling well today but for the tube coming out my chest and the occasional realization that I must quickly make it to another room in the house for a bit. Jeanah is in good spirits and we're trying to deal with who is going to provide our Cable, Internet, Phone, and Cell services...lotsa fun!

He works the Night Shift

Early this morning I had a dream that was important to me. I don't remember dreams often, but this was vivid. Thought I'd share because it was one of those conscious/subconscious/body/soul/spirit kinds of deals.

Through some events in the dream, all the emotion and pain of the events in recent months (cancer, deciding not to be foster parents, etc.) welled up inside me. I was in the middle of a forest clearing on a dark, starry night and I was yelling “WHY” at the top of my lungs. “Why are You letting these things happen to me?”

The phrase “I hate you God” was proposed to me from somewhere, but I yelled “I hate having to go through this!” instead. I kept yelling “Why” “Why are You letting these things happen to me?” “I hate having to go through this!” over and over.

In my mind, I was kind of awake and aware in bed, but obviously not awake. After a time I was crumpled on the ground. I got a sense that it was OK and even expected that I would have been doing this and that God understands. His Spirit comforts me and in my dream feel like I'm back in bed with Jeanah next to me, her head on my shoulder, warm and snuggly.

Then I woke up...2:10am A few minutes later, my Chemo pump beeped telling me it's low on Chemo. This is OK as I'm heading into the doctor at 1pm today to get it refilled.

Later I had another dream. I don't usually share this type of thing, but I got the very real sense I was to pray for the people of Ames, Iowa that they would be able to endure a natural disaster that was coming.

Thanks for listening! God understands us, knows our needs, and He comforts us in time of need.

Situation Normal

Nothing real new to report today. We had a lovely time last night with two of Jeanah's sisters (Julie and Livvy) and their husbands (Jim and Matt) and Julie and Jim's 6 kids (Lauren, Emma, Sam, Mae, Nora, and Millie). It's great to spend time with those you love!

Anyways, feeling pretty normal this weekend...maybe a bit tired...but it's hard to say if that's the Chemo or if it's just winter talkin'. (Still best to be close to the restroom).

Matt showed us a wonderful waste of time called Fantastic Contraption and I've spent about 4 hours on it today. Matt is in such trouble.

Finally, I gotta mention that this weekend, my OSU Beavers beat both the Bay Area Pac-10 schools in hoops for the first time in 16 years. They're playing great ball right now. Go Beavs!

Worth 1000 Words

I thought it was time I posted the pics Jeanah coaxed out of the Gastroenterologist. Yep, what you see is real, unadulterated Rectal Cancer...and something I like about as much. WARNING: it's a medical picture, so I just put the link here: RECTAL CANCER

Today, my Radiation process changed some. They went from the "normal" type of radiation to what they call "IMRT". Read more about it here: IMRT LINK

Anybody Seen my Wallet?

Today I physically feel like some guy named Big Louie met me in a dark alley, kicked the tar out of me, and stole my wallet. However, I also felt this way on Jan 1. after getting the original port-a-cath installed, and yesterday was of course a double dose of that because they had to remove the old one too.

The good news is the Chemo pump seems to be working great. Jeanah drove me to St. Vincent's and I got a shot of radiation to my keister and we found a great "sneak" entrance where I can go right into Radiation Oncology without walking through the entire hospital!

I've been able to work from home today as expected. Only one DSL drop all day, although I gotta say VoIP is not all it's cracked up to be. The regular phone works tons better...

Speaking of working from home, I realized how much I miss the "old" ISI office when we could watch the sunrise from Support every morning. Did you catch it today? Here it is from my office window at home this morning.

Isn't God's handiwork AWESOME!?

2nd Time's the Charm

The installation of the new Port-a-Cath seems to have gone without a hitch. Woo Hoo!

It took a little longer than expected, but I was able to take a later tee-time with the Radiation folks and so now we have 2 radiations down and about 26 to go! It's supposed to go 5 1/2 weeks, so that's Feb 25/26.

This afternoon I got the Chemo pump installed. It's about 8" x 5" and fits in a little pouch that I can hang around my neck or shoulder. It's not too awfully bad.

The doc really doesn't think I'll experience too many side effects because the low dosage, although consistent, is very small.

We'll see!

We also had Canby Telephone come out and do extensive testing on our DSL. They think they may have narrowed down the problem to the type of DSL modem they had us using. They gave us a different type and we'll see how that goes. I'll be trying to work all day tomorrow (except for my 10:12 Radiation tee-time) and see how many times it drops.

God is good!

More Fun Tomorrow!

We found out today that the Port-a-cath for whatever reason, is malfunctioning. Tomorrow at 6am I go in to St. Vincent's to have another one put in. They're trying the right side this time. Surgery at 8am. Should just be heavy sedation, no anesthesia needed just like last time.

I have a 10:12 tee-time in the radiation oncology office at St. V's to get my 2nd dose of radiation. The first one went well today. I didn't notice anything during the visit, but let's just say I'm sticking near the restroom.

Because of the port-a-cath problems, we didn't start Chemo today. That's scheduled tomorrow at 1:40.

I actually got about 3 hours of work-from-home in today! Gotta pay those hospital bills!

Woo Hoo!